$1,000 For A Missing Fence Slat, July 2008
Seriously:
I’m thinking about opening up a store in Fort Collins that sells faded-to-grey, half-rotted fence slats.
I got to thinking about this business proposition last night as I was picking blackberries. My next-door neighbor has a great blackberry bush, a branch of which has grown through where some slats are missing from our property-line fence.
If the City Council has its way, those missing slats make me eligible for a $1,000 fine. If I get busted, I either have to pay the fine, replace the slats with “compatible materials of comparable composition, color, size, shape and quality” or replace the fence. (Come to think of it, I’m pretty much living with the fear that no one from the building codes department reads this column.)
Blowing Smoke, February 2006
Yes, Fort Collins has a "wood smoke hotline".
How well do you really know your city? Did you know that you can go to jail for not meeting the opacity standards for home wood-smoke emissions?
...
If one of your neighbors complains about the odor emanating from the chimney on top of your house, the City sends a letter to all of your neighbors letting them in on the process. Talk about government overreach.
